Brock Caffee, LCMFT
Individual and Family Therapist in Lawrence, Kansas
A Little About Therapy
Not all therapy is the same, so it is a good idea to get some idea of how your therapist practices. While this should not require you to know all there is to know about therapy, you might begin to develop some understanding of how well you will work together.
I founded my practice with the strong belief that I make myself as available as possible to those interested in overcoming challenges, and especially those seeking therapy, as a first step. A phone call to me is not the "wrong decision", even if we do not get to work together for more than a first call. I truly believe that finding the right therapist is of incredible importance. There is a significant body of research supporting the idea that a strong therapy relationship can predict successful outcomes. That knowledge inspires me to work hard to be welcoming and to understand my prospective client, so I can either be the right person or help them find their way in our community.
My therapy practice is about helping clients understand our world, relationships, God, and themselves. Good therapy helps people to adapt to life and struggles, but it isn't just about adapting for comfort or happiness. Ultimately we have the opportunity to learn to live better. Often this comes with insight, sometimes by new experience, but always with kind and compassionate support as clients explore their lives. By spending some time attending to experiences with curiosity and sensitivity we can begin more effectively adapt because we can see what is affecting us more clearly.
In life outside therapy, we don't always get the time or have what is necessary to explore our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and experiences fully. Our nature as humans is complex and deserves a lot of careful attention. It is very easy to misunderstand what is going on an what might be done about it. This is one reason why some problems may seem unsolvable or emotional pain unbearable. It may also be that we have difficulty finding out what is changeable and what must be coped with over time. Therapy can help you outline those distinctions.
I strive to understand my clients need in a holistic manner, as I listen carefully to their needs, and work hard at forming a collaborative partnership. I tend to work with clients using an approach that allows me to help clients discover solutions they have within themselves, their families, and their belief systems that have either been forgotten or dismissed as irrelevant for one reason or another.
At the same time, there is no responsible way to ignore that there is truth regarding what works and what does not, or what is right, righteous, or just plain wrong. Sometimes the solutions we feel are inside us are not solutions, but merely byproducts of years of adapting, for survival sake, to ignore the healing and goodness we are all capable of. It isn't always about comfort or happiness. I am talking about learning to make conscious decisions about how to live, informed by truth. I am also talking about healing from the unrighteous, unfair, and hurtful things you have encountered in life circumstances or from other people, even those you have trusted, loved and cared for. Life can be very difficult and some suffering is nearly guaranteed. People make mistakes, or worse; sometimes people do wrong to us. Because of this, learning how to find healing and mend relationships when possible is very important.
I am a Christian. To me, that means everything. I recognize that for some of you reading this that may not be the case. Feel free to leave my site and find another way, knowing that I welcome you back at any point. My approach to Christian practice is based on the idea that I would rather my biography be a testament to my faith, instead of relying on my words alone. That means I will not preach at you. If you are concerned about my faith affecting your ability to heal in some negative way, I welcome conversations about it before we get started. To me, Christian practice is not morally legalistic. It is about acceptance and love, with open discussions about choices and the implications. In reality, we may talk about "good and bad" decisions, but I do not think we grow in an environment of harshness or condemnation. We may also talk about faith, finding meaning, love, and fidelity to values. At the same time, I strive to host those conversations in an atmosphere of acceptance and understanding. We grow the most when we feel safe and cared for. We grow when we can release fear, anger, shame and guilt. We grow when we know what we are trying to do and who we are called to be. We grow when we find purpose and meaning. We grow the most when we stop just surviving and start living for God. That last part is so important, but I also know it may not be my place to MAKE that happen.
That may or may not be in line with your particular beliefs right now, which I respect. Your relationships, especially that with God, have to be intentional decisions on your part. I look forward to working with you, regardless of how this all lines up.
I am adaptive in my approach and have training and experience that allows me to comfortably work within a variety of areas, including attachment, grief & loss, trauma, divorce, parenting, teen issues, parent-child separation, anger, substance use, coping with substance users, helping those who don't want help, interpersonal boundaries, couples issues, depression, guilt, anxiety, and others...
When it comes to your concerns we can combine our experiences to develop ideas that can be employed to break patterns. No matter what challenges we face as we work together, when you are the client, It is important to me that we work toward YOUR GOALS to reduce distress in whatever form it takes.
I have over a decade of experience in counseling and mental health, which has afforded me the wonderful opportunity to work with a wide variety of people and situations. I work with clients individually, as couples, in small family groups, or in large groups.
Thank you for your interest!